Moment 4

It had stopped she realized.
When, she did not know.
But it had stopped having a hold on her heart.
It did not scramble her insides out or scare her into nausea anymore.
.
And she felt
nothing.
For a moment she was only confused.
Then she noticed that all the good feelings left with the bad.
.
She sat in the middle of the dark hall.
The last one left to lock up and go home.
She sat there and did not get up.
Whispering her thoughts to the empty room
"I'm sorry. I made some mistakes."
"I didn't want to make those bad decisions."
"I shouldn't have left you behind. I should have fought for you."
.
The resolution that came had no grand feeling attached to it.
It was merely a decision.
This was not where she would draw her last breath.
This was not how she would go down in history.
She would be more than this.
She was more than this.
.
And so she left Gorky Park behind.
.
Whilest carrying it with her.